For me the key is language. Language is the KEY of what is “really” going on inside of someone. Their reality. Many of us exquisite human beings, how no idea how revealing is our language. IF we are self-aware we can even get clues by listening to ourselves… What we really think, deep inside versus what we would desire to feel…. Even if we really really “think before we speak”.. the language used.. the pace of words will reveal more. Get the subtle difference?

We call this what is in the “unsaid” in self-leadership terms. Communication is 93% non-verbal, and that is much much more than body language (the text books are a little behind…). Its more about your presence — are you present in your body… are you present in the conversation — when you think, speak, where are you coming from…. etc..

Even with this %, the words used, the language is still KEY to understanding what is really going on for the individual.

For your visual, in my reality it would be something like
first guy – talking – as communication takes place when the message is “understood” l— like 2 arrows touch. first guy is 1 arrow. The first step is “talking”… often talking at… sound coming out….

second guy – communication – message understood. but how does the first guy know message is understood — he has to check clarity in someway… (we often assume clarity…)

third guy – creating – as soon as we give each other space… to have communciation — in that moment we are creating — being inspired by another or being squashed — or said another way being expanded by another or being contracted —

then fourth step — possibility to make it real — to bring it to life – to manifest, co-creation

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Alternatively if you did a 4 step on language… the power of language… perhaps these steps are something like… each step being a possible shift in thinking around language — not really steps as don’t need to build on each other.

1: language is revealing — it often reveals what is inside…. our own reality… our perspective… what our experience of life is like…
e.g. common phrases — “I can’t swallow that”, “Feel like fish out of water…” “He is pain in the neck”…

2 language is revealing point 2 – the choice of words reveals how “complete” the person really feels about something e.g. xxx always does ….blah blah. e.g. I can’t do it… e.g. She never will…
Use of absolutes – always, never is black white language. This reveals the person is “incomplete” with a prior incident, often unaware they are incomplete. So from a business perspective this would be impacting their clarity (event though they would hate to admit it). Its how our recticular system works.

3 Language speaks volumes… it creates in the moment…
e.g. I am delighted. speaks volumes compared to I am well, thankyou
or I invite you to…. speaks volumes compared to Can you pls…

4 When we cannot language something ….. but we can feel it… so we cannot articulate it.. give words to .. speechless… means we have been triggered… our reflexual response to survive – flight fight or freeze.

thats a quick high level thought

content is beyond text books, as they are way behind current thinking and research.
cheers Sus

There has to be a conversation in my head before there can be a conversation with another person.